A Look back at 2017

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It is soon time for the year 2017 to pass and for 2018 to come. And thusly, it is time for me to give it a journal to say what I think of this year and the events that happened in it.

In terms of politics, the things have been rather interesting. Currently we have no government because no coalition could be formed, and it is unsure what will be once we finally have a chancellor. But at least officials do all the things they do anyway, so things work sort of. At least for now, let us hope this will not lead to a rise in power for dangerous parties.
Also, it seems the USA got a new president. He seems to be someone who likes gold. A golden appartment, golden letters on his buildings, golden showers in some hotel in Russia. "You see Mr. Powers, I like gold." *laughs*

Now to other topics, which includes the creative mind. Last year in Novemeber I began to work on character ideas and lore designs to Domahn, the world in which Fatal Radiance takes place. This year I was able to give full scope and depth to this, by finding out how to implement dragons into the lore of Domhan and also creating a dragon character, based on Oriental dragons. Furthermore, I also know how to proceed history, as I do not want a world where culture and technology remain eternally static. Things should change, people should advance, and technology should rise. This also means that different things may be tackled as well, like the rise of national states and the nationalism that gave birth to them.
A great help in all of this has always been TrueCynder, because who else do I got to annoy on Discord about how much I am obsessed with scales, history, and mythology?

Okay, now to the things of my personal life. From January till June I was still part of a group that called itself the R. Pack (names altered, even though they are quite easy to figure out for insiders), under the lead of someone woman named T. I have been with it for a long time actually, but quite frankly, in retrospective I regret it. I was lured in by nice words, later driven to join into needless flamewars, and also to hurt friends. This is just bad shit, guys, real bad shit.
Said T. is a person that at first seemed okay enough, and one notices the darker abyss that is her heart when it is too late and you lie to yourself that you are able to tolerate it. But frankly, that was a mistake to keep up for so long. How often did I have to pretend I liked stuff she liked, because in her opinion only this stuff is good and everything else is garbage. And how often did I tolerate her nationalist garbage of how America is the greatest in everything. Sure, tell the Non-American how inferior he is to the glorious Empire of the USA. Seriously, this shit is more annoying than the grin of Ajit Pai. It is okay for you to be proud of being American, but if you take that fact to establish your superiority over others, then you kind of are fullfilling the definition of being a nationalist. Just saying.
Now, thankfully I have not to deal with this anymore. In July I talked with a few friends about this whole situation and eventually decided to just ditch T for good by renouncing her ideals of conforming to her and to revoke anything I did because of her. Meaning that I also had no more reasons to antagonize anyone and unblock several people, while blocking her. And also telling her how I feel about her in a private message. In all of this, I am glad that the folks that I did care for did also stay with me through this. I was very worried to lose Shanglong and Roller in this, but thankfully they both are as reasonable as I judged them to be. It was time to stop all this nonsense and be free in our own decisions and what we want to do.
Ever since, I have felt much more comfortable with what I do since in the end there is not the feeling of a dreadful judgemental person watching my steps anymore. It really, greatly enhances my motivations and joy in working. I do not have to worry about romance or that something "implies" sex too much. I do not have to care about this anymore. 

Furthermore, the Potoos, the group that formed in these events, has been a very insightful bunch. One is quite able to learn a lot thanks to having friends all over the world. You get many perspectives, many opinions, and many discussions that in the end are very respectful.
And of course, the Passionate Squad is another group to mention. While I am technically not a member and more of an associate or ally, I think it is actually also an example of gaining insight. Despite a rough time, due to the stuff with the R Pack, I was able to keep interesting conversations with folks. 
Really, it does pay off to be just a nice guy and treat people with respect from the start rather than saying that they have to earn it first. Life is much easier, if you just respect people for who they are.

Overall, I think the first half of this year was mostly just a static thing, though I got closer to Gamma Wings while she got further away from T, and I think for the better, as in the end it meant to end this whole phase for many people at last. The second half has been much more interesting, with things having a few ups and downs, but overall it felt much more like being alive. So, not a perfect year, but in the end there was quite a bit of good to it as well.
© 2017 - 2024 AudeS
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BadCowboy69's avatar
Glad to have you back around my friend!  I'm glad you got out of drinking the Kool Aid given out by T. In fact I'm glad all the others did too and y'all are in MY circle now bahahaha....from what I've learned it's a lot harder to be an asshole to someone than to be nice.  Unfortunately T won't ever get rest because of that.  Always having to worry about what everyone is doing and might be doing.  I remember she got upset with me because of a stamp on my front page being blocked on hers since it was listed as mature.  She confronted me about it at her house one day. I told her it's for a Native American group called AIM (American Indian Movement) WHY they made it mature is beyond me, it's not.  But it just made me shake my head at how she got almost demanding with me as to what it was and why it was on my page.  Pffft...no one needs that from anyone.  Good riddance and again i am glad to have you back around!